Thursday, January 10, 2013

One Word 365

Trust.

It was blatantly obvious, I didn't even pick it.  I just knew that's what it was.

I better back up, for those of you who don't know what One Word 365 is.
You pick a word that describes what you want to learn, work on, or embrace that year.  (At least that's how I envision it.)  Last year, I chose joy.

So much is uncertain for me right now.  I learned around Thanksgiving last year that my gallbladder needs to come out.  The rule for me is emergency surgeries only, since I tend to have a poor recover and backslide afterwards due to the drugs and narcotics.  There is some equipment I need to help with my breathing, and I am having a lot of new symptoms and developments.

So when this word challenge came around again in the New Year, I knew it was going to be a year of trust.  In past years, I had to learn to trust.  This year, I need exercise it without holding back because I am not strong enough to do this on my own.
Proverbs 3:5-6
Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding.  In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight.
This is the most imporant part of my One Word 365!  This verse is so special to me.  Psalm 139, as I'm sure I've quoted before, states that He knit me together and ordained my days before I was even born.  He isn't surprised by what is going on in my life!  It is a fallen world, and not how He'd like it to be.  He redeemed me, and has a place for all who receive His gift in eternity, but for now I'll do everything He calls me to do where I'm at.

I also have to trust those whom God has placed in my life.  I am finding it easy lately to trust that my physicians are making the best decisions for me, and accepting those decisions with peace.  There have been some weighty and difficult ones to make recently!  And as I go into surgery, there will be many decisions that my surgeon and anesthesiology team will have to make on the spot.  I need to have absolute trust in them that they are going to make all the right calls.  I've come to the conclusion long ago that it is out of my hands!  God is in control, not me.  I frequently forget this and try to micromanage everything, but He is always quick to gently remind me that He's "got it covered, relax".

When we let go, and trust, we are free to enjoy life.
Milly


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